• zythe
    102
    Hi all,

    During the lock down/safer at home orders, etc., what have you done to relieve the stress?

    I have found that regular runs or bicycling helps a lot with a little wine here and there...
  • fugawe09
    171
    I've been doing a lot more yard work to tame my backyard jungle. There is something kind of cathartic about going to town with a pickax and having something complete to look at afterward. Side effect I've noticed that when I get the power equipment out, Mrs. Fugawe tends to leave me alone for a few hours at a time.

    I've also been working on learning to cook some new things. Partly because Mrs. Fugawe decided we are going to be "healthy" now, I've been working on making things like quinoa edible. Also got a new grill and have been trying some things out. Pretty low key to practice grilling for myself without a bunch of other men hovering around the fire like cavemen and critiquing the flame and meat management. While I do miss my office, removing two hours of stressful driving a day and the associated junk food stops hasn't been the worst thing ever.
  • DrMike
    649
    Minimize and control my time with the news. I avoid TV news and focus on newspaper and/or online media. I find I have more control over how I take in the tone and amount of the narrative, and that dampen the stress buildup.

    Work around the yard and garden ALOT. I like the feel of soil on my hands, and sun in my skin. Add some music on my headphones and I’m happy.

    Lots of walks. My body is too broken down for running, so I’m trying to find low impact aerobic exercises to substitute for cardio I did at the gym.

    I wish I were handier so I could take on some bigger household jobs, but that’s just not my area!

    Hang around our grandkids and provide them a little joy and stability. That’s been a lifesaver. That and occasional midweek (less crowded) short trips to our cabin.
  • agalum
    294
    We have an escape house in remote Lassen County so have been spending more time there which is major league social distancing. Ive been taking on-line spanish lessons and planning to improve my German. Missing my low impact cardio at the gym, biking to make up for it but very nervous about biking on country roads.
  • Oldbanduhalum
    589
    Good topic. For me it’s been cooking. Not 5* by any means but I’m trying to be more creative than what we do in normal times. As every day is sort of a repeat of the previous day, I find myself looking forward to the daily change of the dinner menu.
  • 72Aggie
    300
    Have been retired for 5 years, so staying home is kind of what I do best. Wife is now working from home so I tiptoe around the house and do chores and honey-dos. I have not figured out how a shopping list of five items can take four different stores.

    Kind of like Dr. Mike, but yard work and gardening for me is digging holes where my wife tells me to. She's the one with the green thumb. Don't have the wherewithal to do major projects but do little fix-it things. Exercise has been reduced to walking the dog...frequently. Slowly trying to de-clutter a house and lifestyle that has all the accumulated stuff of a retirement, and all the things we acquired from parents and parents-in-law.

    No second home. No grandkids. Trying to catch up on reading.
  • DrMike
    649
    I retired April 1 so it’s been a little challenging to go to the abrupt SIP straight from working. No gym, no golf (for the first couple of months) and a couple of my possible volunteer areas on hold. I might borrow my son’s old bike and ride a bit; like AgAlum, I’m a little nervous about finding a route that’s safe. We have some nice paved trails here but they are all on the other side of town.
  • 72Aggie
    300
    Really need to pick up on the exercise. I live close to the American River Bike Trail in Sacramento, which is nice though not as nice as it once was with the growing homeless population. Weather is always a factor in the central valley in mid-summer.

    Also one child is a currently unemployed chef, who from time to time now cooks meals for the family. Only problem is that "child" is used to cooking for large numbers of people, so we have large quantities of well prepared food, and that leads to "Really need to pick up on the exercise," which is where I started this note.
  • Firefan17
    34
    Really enjoying this thread. For me, this has definitely been a challenging time. As a single guy in his 30's who lives alone, the past several months have honestly been a pretty difficult. Being isolated in a 900 sq ft apartment isn't exactly the best of situations for someone who's battled with depression most of his life as well. I've always been an avid jogger so my daily runs have been a welcomed escape. For me, surprisingly I've found some of my closest friendships have grown even stronger despite the lack of face to face interaction for the most part (there have been a few outside, socially distanced meet ups). I typically hate relying on texting and technology to communicate, I'm all about being with people in person and hanging out and talking to each other face to face, but this has obviously forced me to adapt, and though it all I feel like I've become closer to a lot of the most important people in my life. Just having a running text conversation going throughout the day and evening have been a life saver. Couple that with some nice long phone calls at the end of the day and it has really been kind of special and unexpected. Having said that, I'm definitely looking forward to the day when we're able to return to some sense of normal and we won't have to fear being around those who are closest to us.
  • 69aggie
    370
    Fire, hang in there. We are all with you. Your post helped me. Stay strong. . . .
  • DrMike
    649
    I think reaching out to friends in some form is important. I’ve been trying to do that on a regular basis with my single friends. Just being out and among other people is healthy. We often get food to go and sit in a downtown park where we can people watch and get some fresh air.

    My mom is an active 86, who has lost the ability to do her volunteer work, have her weekly lunch group, and visit the library. We talk often on the phone and try to have backyard lunch when possible to help keep her positive. She hasn’t seen great grandkids since XMAS, and it’s not clear when she’ll get a chance to. That’s sad for her and me.
  • zythe
    102


    Hang in there, I’m pretty much in the same boat.

    Music, running, and phone calls are super important.

    I’ve noticed that when I feel especially low, it’s because I haven’t exercised in days. That hormonal uptick when exercising really makes a difference.

    I’ve also seen that reading a good book helps as well.
  • DrMike
    649
    I like country music and I can usually find an artist doing a virtual show every day. Saturdays they have been doing the Grand Old Opry (empty) with two or three performers (usually old timers!)

    Early on, the various Aggie podcasts were good. Hawk talks were very entertaining. We also had 3-4 team Aggie zoom get togethers with Blue and coaches. Those have stopped unfortunately but I suspect they might be on hold until there is more clarification on fall, since 99% of the audience questions are on that subject (and there are no answers)
  • agalum
    294

    Are you furloughed from work? I’m on recall after retiring and it is actually nice to go into work once in a while. As Zythe said, exercise is a great stress reducer. With that said, this whole situation is depressing for everyone so you're not alone.
  • Goags20172
    162
    I find it's helpful to watch as little live tv as possible. You are inundated with ads full of people taking trips and enjoying themselves outside, many of them taped before COVID- 19. The ads for the psoriasis drug Skyrizi are particularly annoying. None of those people are wearing masks or practicing social distancing. And then there are the ads from the companies trying to one- up each other in promoting their philanthropy/progressiveness. Just do your good work and shut up about it I say. Wishful thinking. Also those tongue- in- cheek ads where people are video- conferencing their social activities and pretending most people aren't visiting. CoVID- 19 didn't magically spread itself.

    If you have DVD movies/tv shows/some service through your cable provider allowing you to skip ads that's a good way to enjoy shows without having constant reminders of what you can't do.
    If you have a Goodwill store near you you can get a lot of movies very cheaply without having to deal with delivery people (though you probably want to sterilize them before use) My local Goodwill is open.

    And I agree with the music. It helps to pick mellow stuff.
  • BlueGoldAg
    1.1k
    I retired 10 years ago and time is flying by way too fast now. I'm a retired therapist and I eased into retirement so the change was not too jarring for me. I had a full time, private practice and then, during my final 11 years. I cut my private practice back to 50% and took on a half time contract with Sacramento City College providing mental health services to students. I enjoyed doing both. In my final 2 years I closed my private practice but kept on with my job at SCC.

    It was hard for me to leave my work at SCC. I loved working with underprivileged students and all the different cultures, ethnicities and religions that they came from but my wife had retired a year earlier and we wanted to take long trips so I pulled the plug. We immediately left for Peru to travel for 6 weeks with our son who was studying in Lima and that helped me transition nicely into retirement. I still miss doing therapy at times but I also love the freedom we have to travel and enjoy many other things we didn't have time for when we were both working.

    My wife and I have settled into what's become a pretty predictable routine each day during the pandemic. We usually have a leisurely, light breakfast and coffee and catch up on email and read the news online. My wife is still devoted to the paper copy of the Bee but I tend to read it online. We also have online subscriptions to the New York Times and the Washington Post. We both read CNN and Politico a lot also. We're both news junkies and, even though all the political stuff and the Covid news can be emotionally draining, we seem to handle it pretty well. We keep ourselves busy with household chores and our hobbies during the day and we watch various series on Netflix, HBO, Amazon Prime and Hulu in the evenings. We also take long evening walks after dinner when it isn't too stinking hot!

    We have hobbies we enjoy that include reading, gardening and travel for both of us but, of course, travel is out now during the pandemic. She is an excellent pastel artist and a great cook. I have taken up wooden ship modeling, got back into photography, play my guitars at my leisure and started learning to bake bread.

    I'm also an avid road cyclist. I took it up 2 years before I retired. Before that I did a lot of rock climbing, backpacking, mountain biking and running. I thought road cycling would be boring compared to mountain biking but I found it has it's own beauty and excitement and it gave me an aerobic activity that was much easier on my knees and back than running was. I bought my dream bike last year and it's a pure joy to ride. I log a ton of miles on the American River Bike Trail but I ride a lot on the road too. I like to ride in the big hills outside of Winters, up in the Amador County foothills and over in the the Napa and Sonoma Valley areas. I have been ticking off some of the big, classic rides in northern California the past couple of years. I figure I need to do them while I can since the clock just keeps on ticking and I enjoy the challenge.

    My wife was very regular at going to the gym to workout before everything closed. So I bought some dumbbells and a bench and she works out in the garage now. I need to do weight bearing exercises as well but I'm more motivated to ride my bike. We both miss not having sports to watch or go to and are happy to see the Giants playing even if it is without any fans in the seats.

    So for us, enjoying our hobbies and engaging in regular exercise plus keeping in touch with friends and family via texts and zoom calls helps us during these trying times. We try to keep our heads up in the midst of the Covid tragedy and all of the divisive politics by remembering that, although these are tough times, we've got a whole lot to be thankful for...carpe diem...
  • DrMike
    649
    any streaming suggestions? We watched Bosch (we both had read all the books before), and then have been re-reading the books in order. Having a hard time finding series we like. My wife gets worn down by the sex and language that seems to be overused on Netflix series. Schitt’s Creek has been fun but we’re getting close to the end. We might go back and watch Friday Night Lights and West Wing.
  • agalum
    294

    Yellowstone. I usually dont watch series but this one is excellent.
  • fugawe09
    171
    I've got 30 years until retirement, but getting a taste now I guess since my job is indefinitely furloughed. On one hand I was working 60 hours a week and too busy to take vacation so the break is nice but also stressful to both wait by and simultaneously want to avoid the phone on Friday afternoons. As far as TV, thankfully we don't have any cable news in the house, but I enjoy re-watching 90's sitcoms and catching jokes I didn't get on their first run. Disney+ has a pretty good catalog. My guilty pleasure is watching Netflix trash reality shows, where I can find some solace in watching people who have much bigger problems than mine.
  • Firefan17
    34
    I truly appreciate all of the thoughtful responses. One of the other things that I didn't mention in my initial post is that even things like being a part of this message board and the sense of community it provides have been a welcomed outlet throughout all of this. In terms of working, I work out of my apartment as an online counselor. As you can imagine, we've seen huge surge in people reaching out to us struggling with the various mental heath aspects associated with the current situation. From what I've witnessed, the pandemic and lockdowns haven't necessarily caused a huge number of new mental health problems but rather it seems to have greatly exacerbated ones that were simmering below the surface and are now front and center. So unfortunately I don't get out of the house for work, during normal times I'm a huge coffee shop guy and have a Starbucks that's almost like a second home where I'm friends with most of the staff, so missing out on that has been disappointing, but it is what it is. I know I'll appreciate it all the more when I am finally able to return to my usual hangout spot.

    references cutting down on a lot of the live television, unfortunately I'm quite the news junkie and if the TV is on chances are it's got CNN on or news of some sort. I know full well it can be an overload and I TRY to maintain an awareness of when I need a break and listen to some music or a podcast. The ads that are running, don't get me started! You could do a great dissertation on all the different aspects and approaches companies have taken. I'll just say in general I'm pretty cynical when I see all these ads with companies patting themselves on the back for just how much they care and how much of a good actor they are.

    Even though it's still a long way out I'm letting myself think ahead to the travel that I intend on doing once it's again safe to do so (i.e. vaccine). I've spent so much time in the past with the mentality of "someday I really want to visit...", well this has really made me realize that you have to take advantage of the opportunity to take these bucket list trips when you have to chance to because the future is not guaranteed to any of us. I was actually in the hospital with a health scare at the beginning of all this in March, so that served as a huge eye-opener for me as well. As hard and trying and this has been, I can honestly say I have grown from it and am a better person in spite of it. And I know that hopefully in the summer of 2021 I'll be on a plane to Paris and then onto Italy! said it best, Carpe Diem!
  • zythe
    102
    There was a beginning to this virus and there will be an end.

    One of the strange things that has occurred because of the safer at home measures, and I think there is literature out there on this, is that my dreams are more vivid when I sleep. I believe it has to do with our mind not getting enough stimuli from our usual daily activities so it has to compensate for it.

    At work they programmed therapy sessions for all of us, but I really didn’t take advantage of it. I have been so bogged down with work that it’s been hard to keep up with all of the resources out there that can help me. I work in a city building so the measures are a bit more stringent; they just let us know that we probably won’t be back to “normal” until early 2021.
  • 72Aggie
    300
    As I have said once or twice I am retired and married and staying at home is right in my skill set. The people I really feel for are the young singles. We have two 30-something single children. One has been laid off but hopes to go back to work in a month, the other is preparing to move cross-country for a new job. Neither was seeing anyone when this thing started and meeting and dating is hard enough in good times but so much harder now. We have neighbors with teen age daughters. One finished her senior year in high school - no commencement, no prom, still not sure if she is going away to college or going to continue at home and take online classes. Another turned 16 last month and had to wait until last week to get an appointment with DMV to get a driver’s license. Very cute girls, but no social life to speak of. I should probably be happy about that because I am not dealing with boys driving by at all hours of the night. So much of being in high school and college is learning to socialize. I remember every stupid thing I did around girls, or all the dumb things I did after a few drinks, but fifty years down the road I have yet to use the quadratic formula in my life.

    Hang in there, “this too shall pass.”
  • Oldbanduhalum
    589
    My son is entering his senior year at Washington State (go Cougs). We just found out this week that all of his classes will be online, at least for fall semester. He’ll probably do the classes from home, so that means not seeing his friends again, no more playing ball at the rec, no more cougar football. It sucks. But he rolls with issues pretty well so he’ll be fine. We’re all effected in a lot of ways.
  • Firefan17
    34
    It sounds like your kids and I are very much in the same boat as single 30-somethings trying to navigate these *different* times. You're definitely right, even in the best of times dating is a challenge, but this has taken it to a whole other level! I had actually begun casually seeing someone, just a couple of dates, right before the onset of the pandemic. We've done a pretty good job of keeping the relationship afloat and getting to know each other as best we can through texts and phone calls but there's obviously no substitute for real face to face interaction. I have no idea exactly how things will play out, trying to judge the true romantic potential between the two of us at this point is still virtually impossible, but regardless we've developed a really nice friendship over the past few months and if we are lucky enough that something further comes of it, it'll certainly make for a heck of a story! As tough as it's been, I can't imagine what it would have been like to have still been in school and lost out on all the social experiences of high school and college. I feel so bad for those kids that are losing out on all those rites of passage that you mentioned that we've really come to take for granted.
  • Idaho Aggie
    43
    I have a daughter at the University of Idaho starting her senior year and a son who is supposed to start his freshman year there. Right now UI is sticking to its flex plan calling for a mix of in-person and online classes, and we're waiting to see what the fall actually brings. This part of Idaho has had a surge of cases in recent weeks, so it's wait-and-see time for us. No prom for our son, and a drive-in graduation, but he's flexible and not too bummed out about it.
  • Oldbanduhalum
    589
    my son has spent quite a bit of time in Moscow (mostly at the Buffalo Wild Wings). Nice school and nice town. It’d be interesting if UI stays with the flex but WSU goes all online, with them being about 10 miles apart. It sucks but it sounds like your kids are adapting. Really hoping that the college graduations take place in person next spring!
  • NCagalum
    209
    Lot of house projects including installing a recirculating hot water return loop so we don’t have to wait 1.5 minutes for hot water to get to our master bath, car maintenance/repair and playing a lot of trombone (learned garage band to play up to 8 parts so have my own trombone choir). Some bike riding although I won’t got out in this terrible heat humidity. My wife does but I’m fine drinking coffee and reading paper instead. Several camping trips on our travel trailer.
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